“It’s funny, the way we manage to take on different personas in order to survive, to protect ourselves.”
It’s funny, the way we manage to take on different personas in order to survive, to protect ourselves.
I wouldn’t go so far as to say ‘multiple personalities’ in most cases, but clever masks to hide how we really feel when the pain of our inner reality is too much to bear.
I had been doing this for years without really understanding why and looking back, it’s clear that I was using these different masks to shield myself from the truth of my pain which had at times become unbearable for one person to carry alone.
Enter, my many masks, which in my deepest level of distraction could become quite amusing and often led even to donning different wigs and hats and crazy make-up 😂.
“Many times my masks saved me from feeling things I wasn’t ready to face as I was able to simply hide behind these clever facades of faces; sort of pretend I was someone else for a while.”
Many times my masks saved me from feeling things I wasn’t ready to face as I was able to simply hide behind these clever facades of faces; sort of pretend I was someone else for a while.
(Having fun with an alter ego a couple years back 🔥)
Looking back, I felt unsafe in my own skin, so temporarily taking on another was a way of protecting my self and of having some reprieve from my true feelings. Also, it was just fun! Under the right circumstances of course..
(My husband sometimes joined in on the alter ego action, too! 🤷♀️😍)
I now understand that sadly it was all too often another way for me to further shove down memories of abuse and terrified feelings to avoid facing what needed to be faced to fully heal my body, mind, and spirit.
It is in fact quite clever how we as human beings manage to adapt ourselves for survival and the many forms it can take. Even in my own close and loving relationship with my husband of many years I felt unease with being in my own skin and acting as myself, so playing ‘dress-up’ was a way of turning into someone else and feeling safe to explore my sensual side. Hey, don’t knock it til you try it 🤷♀️😉.
I no longer feel the need to shed my skin and break out my masks. I’m quite comfortable with who I am and I’m no longer running from the truth. I‘ve faced it and yes, it was ugly. But it wasn’t me I was running from after all.
Underneath my many masks I’ve always been who I was meant to be; who we are all meant to be: love, intrinsic worth, portals of peace.
In these bodies on earth it’s easy to forget that we are simply spirits having human adventures. 🌟
“Our masks don‘t always take on plastic shape...”
Our masks don’t always take on plastic shape. Often we walk around smiling while feeling dead inside. Or act out of anger to numb and further shove down fear or hurt.
There is nothing wrong with temporarily wearing our masks as long as we feel safe to take them off at the end of the day, to let our precious faces feel the sweet air and to bask in the glow of our vulnerability.
Depending on the reason, it can be fun to play with our outer shell and to don different personas from time to time. I might actually go dig up my rainbow wig for shits n gigs. 🤔🤷♀️🌈🙌😘
At the end of the day, masks are fun, but nothing is more beautiful than our natural, authentic selves. In my humblest of opinions. ❤️
(In all my bald headed glory a couple years back.)
**Thank you for reading and for sharing in my healing journey. I hope to bring as much healing to others as I‘ve been blessed with and quite frankly, writing about my own process heals me more each time I put pen to paper.
As always, feel free to share any of my posts which strikes a chord with you or a loved one. We are in this healing thing together! 🙌🏼
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